Full of Busy

Funny old thing, work.

From leaving school at 16, I worked full time. Apart from a couple of maternity leaves, which were as short as they could be, I toddled off every day to do my bit for the economy - until August 2010 when I was made redundant.

Confident that my range of skills and qualifications would be highly desirable to many employers,  I soon found out that it wasn't the case.  At that time, Further Education and Training was undergoing a huge change.  Contracts ending and new ones thin on the ground.  There were many others, just like me also chasing the handful of vacancies out there.

It worked out quite nicely that two weeks into my unemployed status I had a three week holiday to Florida. It was great being able to pack and get the house sorted without the usual headless chicken thing.  It was also nice being on holiday and having nothing related to work to think about.

On my return, reality set in. Days, weeks spent on job agency websites, vacancy boards, sending off application forms etc, and the extremely demotivating lack of response.  Not to mention the fortnightly trip to face the condescending security guard at the Job Centre.  I so wanted to tell him what I thought of his attitude to people.

Agencies contacted me with fantastic opportunities, which fizzled off into nothing after a couple of phone calls.  The only work on offer was hourly paid teaching work.  I jumped through the agency hoops and ended up with a couple of days a week.  Luckily a full time temporary job came up the following week which meant I only had to endure a couple of days.

Obviously temporary means at some point it ends. It did, well half of it did. August 2011 saw me a part-timer for the first time.

For years, I had been envious of friends who only worked a few days, and had time to get their housework done mid week rather than spending half the weekend doing it.  I mentally made a list of all the things I could do with my time.  The scrapbooking, card making, decorating, reading, exercising, even gardening!  I was going to enjoy being part time.

Unfortunately, very little of the above got done.  No idea why, but time seemed to disappear a lot faster than a 9-5 day at work. I pottered, sat in school car parks, did errands and tidied up but none of what was on my list.  Gradually the four day weekends got tedious.  The two and a half days at work were very mundane and not at all challenging.  My brain began to shrivel.  I was bored!

This week I started a proper full time permanent job again.  Not the job I would have preferred but it's a good job, and I have really enjoyed the planning and preparation this week. Next week I'm out and about doing my job as an assessor and trainer.  Meeting people, using my brain and getting back to my normal happy self.

I now know that the lack of a full time job affected me in more ways than just financially.  I had days when I lacked confidence, felt depressed and even questioned my worth to society. The way I felt this week reminded me of how I used to feel.  I'm sure the day will come when I'm tired and stressed and wish I didn't have to go in to work...but I will never relish the thought of not having to go to work again.

And another thing...I have got round to posting on my blog again!

 "If you want a good job doing, ask a busy person"