Maybe it's an age thing. Maybe it's because I see my eighteen year old turning into a man with a life ahead of him that will hopefully be full of worthwhile, exciting times like mine. Maybe I'm just realising that at this age , despite feeling like I did at twenty, I can't get away with irresponsible behaviour.
I also got to thinking about what things and events have made me the person I am today.
Being an only child
This definitely had a huge effect, coupled with the fact that I was an only child in a village with few children my own age and mostly boys. Having only my own company, I learnt to enjoy being on my own doing things in the peace and quiet of my own room. I loved drawing and painting, listening to music and reading.
I also had to learn pretty quick that if I wanted to do anything it was up to me. I had no siblings to hold my hand. My parents weren't very affectionate and more or less left me to myself. I was happy going places on my own and making decisions without help or discussion.
It did have it's negative side though. It took a long time to get used to sharing things with others when I joined the Navy. Seventeen years of having your own room and own belongings then to be thrown in with a group of strangers in a small space with no privacy.
I once went out with someone who was also an only child. If ever a relationship was doomed!
I'm still very independent although being married for almost 22 years has meant a lot of compromise. I will still happily go places on my own, walk into a pub on my own and even take a holiday on my own given the chance. I secretly wish for a private place where I can go and be alone.
Music
I love music. Always have. My first memory was of a friend of my Dad's who was also a Policeman singing 'Cinderella Rockerfella' to me, teaching me to join in. I was a Donny Osmond fan and loved The Bay City Rollers. As a young teenager I danced away to Northern Soul, Abba and Boney M. I then hurtled into the darkness of Punk Rock, my first experiences of live music and hanging around with a backstage pass and a boyfriend who looked the spit of Paul Weller waiting for autographs from bands like The Clash, Stiff Little Fingers and Siouxsie and the Banshees.
At seventeen I left home and began to socialise a lot in clubs and Navy 'bops'. I wore baggy trousers, RaRa skirts and had some dodgy hair-do's . Loved Shalamar, ABC and especially Human League.
I met my husband and spent many an hour listening to his music. The Doors and Love mostly but other classic bands that I hadn't really bothered with before. On long drives home I sang along to my tapes. Even now certain songs remind me of particular journeys.
We've been to see several bands, The Cult, The Mission, Rolling Stones, 20th Century Doors, Prince, Grace Jones, Kasabian, Echo and the Bunnymen, Santana, The Monkees, and many others and play music a lot of the time in the house.
Now my taste is a mixture of all of these plus some more recent R&B, drum and bass and death metal. I don't mind the odd Lady Gaga song and will jig about a bit to Rihanna. Recently I found myself going almost full circle by downloading a load of 80's music.
I couldn't imagine life without music around me.
Watch out for part two if I ever get around to writing anything!
